I mean I work 8 hours a day and then occasionally, I will go out with a friend or two for an hour or two, but I don't really do much except sit in this (see the post entitled "WHY?" for the adjective that goes here) hotel room watching TV, writing my blog, or playing my guitar. I have at LEAST a few extra hours a week to do things that other people claim that they don't have time to do...I could do some situps (god forbid) or I could go for a walk (er..um...no. I do that for my normal mode of transportation--let's forget that one). I could learn to speak Spanish or Japanese or Farsi. OR, I could mediate more. I could try to make it longer than 15 or 20 minutes. I could become a TRUE Zazen (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zazen ) master. I could do it...I sure could.
So why don't I?
To be honest, it has always been hard for me to be quiet. It has always been hard for me to sit still. Ask anyone that knows me. Talk talk talk talk....That's me.
But here is another truth. Sometimes (less each time I do it) I feel kinda stupid. I mean really? Just sitting there? What does that possibly accomplish besides making me look like stupid?
(Now, Kit flips the script on you...hang on).
Wait a minute! Looks stupid to whom? Who else is in this room? Who else can see? I mean I do PLENTY of other things when I am alone that I don't want other people to see (Shut up!) and yet, I still do those things everyday (I said, SHUT UP!) - So think about it---Who am I trying to impress here?
It goes back to ego. Sitting and meditating is a sign of submission in a way that men aren't used to accepting. Shutting up and surrendering to self and the universal messages inside of us is not easy. And to be even MORE honest, when you first start the art of Zazen, it is kinda boring. I mean--dammit--you're just sitting there. There aren't any noises or colors or sex scenes or car chases or gun fights or explosions. Its just you and your floor (yes, you need to sit on the floor) and the four walls and nothingness. You know what else? Its not comfortable AT ALL. At least not at first. I mean for God's sake--humans invented chairs for a reason. Sitting on the floor sucks.
That's OK, though. It is all part of the process. No one sits like The Buddha under the Bodhi tree right out of the box. You gotta figure it out. You gotta practice. Just like playing sports or the guitar or video games or anything else that gives you pleasure (SHUT UP!), you gotta work at it before you get GOOD at it.
"But Kit, what is the pay off?"
The payoff, my friend is exactly what you are looking for: Answers. Believe it or not, when you do it the first time, even if it manage only two or three minutes, you begin to understand. You begin to see inside yourself. You begin to sink down into yourself. Then when you manage five or six minutes you start to gather information. When you work your way into twenty or thirty minutes, you begin to gain insight and abilities of mindfulness that you can't even fathom right now. And it just goes further and further---the more you do it, the more you like it--the more you like it, the more you do it. The more you do it, the more you learn, the more you learn, the more you do it. And the more you do it, the closer you get to your truth.
So right now (all we have is now, remember) sit down, set the alarm on your phone for three minutes, close your eyes and just breathe---Listen to your breath. Feel the tingle in the back of your throat as your breathe--and just be quiet. Shut your face for three minutes and be quiet. You will be amazed and how much you will hear.
Peace to you...PLEASE BE NICE to each other!
Kit
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