Mind and Body Connected

It has been a long long time since I dedicated myself to getting my physical body in the kind of shape that my spiritual being is striving to become.

The mind and body in concert with each other is a beautiful thing.

Back in the gym has given me a new way of handling some things in my real life. It has given me a goal, a pastime and a reason.

I am going to be moving back home to Oregon in a few months. I am going to quit the radio business for good. I am using it only as a paycheck. Though I am good at it, and it is second nature to me; I am just not passionate about it anymore. I go through the motions because that is what I CAN do in order to succeed. It doesn't challenge me - it  doesn't inspire me - it doesn't move me the way it used to.

The only thing calls me is the chance to use the next 30 years of my life (as that is probably all I have left) to inspire people to become more than they are allowing themselves to be. I want to help people to understand their paths, improve their outlook and become healthier in their mind as well as their body.

I have the knowledge, I have the education, I have the skills. It is time to put them all into motion.

I will hurt people when I leave here. They won't understand. They will be angry. That is on them. I can't live such a meaningless, shallow existence. I can't force others to follow my path and I can't follow theirs.

One day, I might find someone who's path coincides with mine. But that is not now.

I've been away. My mind has been at play

Turns out that I am more human than I want to be and more fallible that I had hoped that I was.

I disappeared from my blog for various reasons. The primary being that I felt like I didn't need it, or rather, it didn't need me anymore. I felt like I was not giving it proper attention and therefore it was wilting and didn't care.

So I left. I was gone from writing because my mind was elsewhere. It was with women, work, family and ego.

Lesson learned.

In the last few months, I have learned new things about myself.

1. I thought I hated being alone. That's not true. What I hated was loneliness. Being alone is actually ok. 
2. I am not happy being away from my son. I am away because of material reasons. If you are a reader of this blog, you know what I went through a year or so ago...I am terrified that I will go through that again if I leave the comfort of my current situation--but I am also aware that the only part of my life that IS happy is my wallet. Everything else is for shit. But that is ok. That is the WAY that it is supposed to be right now. 
3. I have come to realize that the things that make me the happiest have nothing to do with anyone else. It is ALL on me.

So what now? Do I continue the path? Do I wake up tomorrow and accept? 

No. I do not. 

"It is what it is" - That damned saying that has been so misunderstood. It means simply that today is today. Understand it and move on. It has NOTHING to do with acceptance. Just because you understand that something is right or wrong in your life, doesn't mean that you have to accept it or like it. 

Take the steps. Release control of the outcome, but take the steps nonetheless. 

You will unveil the answers that are already within you. 

Peace to you. I will be here more. I will stay true to it and to myself.

Kit